To the light of my life... to my Son

It’s been 1 year today that we took you home - my child you are growing up. It seems like it was yesterday. I fall in love with you deeper and deeper each and every day.

Its still fresh in my mind - meeting you for the first time. The doctor pulled you out and held you up, and when I saw you for the first time, you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen! You cried and it made Amma cry because I had waited so long to meet you and hear that sound. I held you in my arms and you looked right in my eyes. It was the most magical moment of my entire life. In that moment, I knew I was your mother and you were my son and you would change my life forever…

It has been an incredible year. I saw your toothless smile, your first giggles, and I cheered you on when you began to roll for the first time. I love watching you curl up and lay your fluffy, brown hair onto my arms and sleepily close your eyes - yet a contented smile remains on your face. I love the way you convince me with that 4 teethed grin.

You melt my heart every time you smile, and when you lay your head on my shoulder after a long day…it helps make the world right again.

And now, you are a little boy laughing, talking, charming every person who is lucky enough to meet you. You are standing on your own and learning your first steps, you are one now, but beginning a journey—A journey that will take you in many different directions and teach you many things. As I sit here and watch you cautiously take your first of many steps in life, I think of the man I hope you’ll become and that I will do anything under the sun to be a good mother to you and help guide you in your journey through childhood and into adulthood.

I will forever cherish the memories gained and the joy I have received watching you, loving you.

You are my sunshine, my heart, my purpose for being—my everything. I’m so very proud of you and honored to be your Mumma. This last year has been filled with priceless memories and I look forward to so many more to come.

I can’t wait to see what happens during the next years.

I love you Chicku

Amma

I just know u r my love,

I just know u r my love,
My love forever…
Let the world be harsh to me,
But I am the same….my thoughts are the same,
I just know u r my love,
My love for ever…

It is u, whom I love,
I know I am fooling myself waiting for u
But I am glad to be a fool this time..
I just know u r my love
My love forever ...

Be not be rude my love
Be not be harsh on me
I know I have not told u till date
But I guess this is the way to say
I just know u r my love
My love forever…

Semi-circle of Trust

I have always been under the impression that trust and respect are the two pillars of love. If you understand the two pillars you sustain in any relationship be it mother, wife or sister.

It was quite recently that I came across this funny term 'Circle of trust' from the movie Meet the Parents where the bride’s father maintained a circle of trust within his family. Now let me explain what does this Circle of trust mean. It means No Secrets and No Lies. I was wondering if such a circle really exists and if I had such a circle. After thinking for a while, since my childhood I just had 2 member in my circle of trust my sister and me – we had absolutely no secrets and never lied to each other. It was 3 years back that a new member was added to my circle – my husband and now Chiku. Well the circle is growing. By the way here the circle is bit incomplete, since I believe there is no such circle between my sister and my husband. So here it’s a semi-circle of trust :)

So now looking at the first statement that I made, do I love non-members? Yes I do love my parents and grandmom. But they are not part of the circle because I have some secrets from them and I guess they too. Also dad had way too many secrets which disqualify him to be in any circle.

Why am I talking about all these today – I am seeing that some of the links in my semicircle is breaking since past few months. I am trying to fix my semicircle but as I fix one link the other link breaks. As some great person said “Trust is like a vase.. Once it's broken, though you can fix it the vase will never be same again.” I am seriously worried that one of the pillars of love is falling.

Now I realize that this circle is just ideal and to achieve the ideal is almost hopeless.
Here is the latest math on the 2 pillars
Do not trust anybody 100% because those you trust the most can steal the most
Respect follows equality because men are respectable only as they respect
So here is the outcome - Love but don’t love whole-heartedly, because it will break your heart one day.

Culinary Skill

I never thought I will have an entry named “Culinary Skill” in my blog :)
Cooking is an interesting subject for many but not me. Despite, I survived for the past 3 years with my innovative styles and styles derived from my roommates.
My roommates were mostly from North India, so was my cooking style.

Today I was chatting with my colleague on the various Indian dishes. I was always under the impression that North Indians (include all states) have more variety of dishes than the South. But then I started counting the number of dishes that my mom used to make. The count went on. There are large variety of dishes which are peculiar to Kerala, be it vegetarian or the spicier non-vegetarian, be it the rice flavoured savoury 'appams' or those crunchy chips variety, be it the delicious seafood delicacies or the leafy or root vegetables Kerala has it all. Each dish has its unique taste. It was now that I realized that I don’t know to cook any of the stuffs from my own land – Kerala except Sambhar and Rasam.

Well that’s not good. My son should be able to taste each of stuff that his mom loves to eat. Though not a pro, I should learn to make those dishes.

Well let me list down all the items that my mom cooked.
I will start with vegetarian since my husband is a vegetarian. Pssst…I have been a core non-vegetarian and I like non-veg more.

Breakfast:

Idli (savoured with coconut chutney/ ulli chamandi/ Sambhar)
Dosa
Appam
Pathiri
Kozhikatta
Puttu (with kadala/pappadam/pazham)
Nool puttu
Upmaav (made of rava/podiari/sevaya/Lapsee)
Ada

Curries:

Sambhar
Avial
Kalan (kaya/chena/mango)
Olan
Kuruk kalan
Rasam
Elishery
Malagusham (7-8 types)
Pachadi
Paripu (Daal)

Muringadaella curry
Cherupayar

Payasam:
Paripu pradaman
Pazham vazhatiya payasam
Chakka Payasam
Palada (My all time favourite)
Ari payasam (with milk or sharkara)

Pickles:

Pulinchi
Vadopuli
Kadumanga
Maangakari

Sabji:
Varieties of sabji’s with 95% of the vegetables in India.
Most of the sabjis are less spicy like mezhukupurati

Snacks

Unni appam
Paripu vada
Uzhunu vada
Kaya varuthatu
Achapam
Sharkara upperi
Pazham pori
Muruku
Pooram varuthatu
Avil kuzhachatu
Cherupayarum sharkarayum
Kuva verukiyathu


Yumm.. it’s an exhaustive list. Also I have forgotten few names. Sista please help me. So for now I will stop here and will start with my favorite section Non-Veg. I prefer mostly small sea fishes and chicken – Only home made.

Chicken…. exclusively the one cooked by my dad. I am not sure of his recipe, but whatever style he tries it turns out very tasty.
My mom is a pro in fish curry. All my friends and relatives love her style and they specially come to have fish cooked by her.
verum puli
verum puli with pacha manga
Malsyam patichadu with kodampuli
varutha arachu vechatu
Kurumolaku arachu vechatu
Roasted fish
Fried fish

Well I am very hungry now. It’s been ages since I had fish. I will have to wait for mom for non-vegetarian.
But I can start with my lessons for vegetarian dishes. So here I take the oath that I will cook at least one of these vegetarian dish every week. :)

10 Reasons which makes my Dad PERFECT

1. He always had faith in me, that I will do good in my life
2. He taught me to be independent
3. He always kept faith in my decisions and supported me.
4. He always kept quiet in the worst situations, thinking I’ll get hurt
5. He never gave me choices and respected what I chose.
6. He always provided me the BEST, never asked anything in return
7. He is always my luck.
8. He is always there when I need him
9. He loves me more than I loved him
10. And, He is there when I cry, He is there when I fall, He is there when I broke his heart, With love above all.

Love you Acha

To My Confidante...

Bestest of my friend, greatest of my treasures.
A sister by blood, A friend by choice – that’s my angry young Unni.
Every body says she is strong by heart… but I know when it comes to her loved ones, she is the weakest. Ready to give all what she has.

She is a very level-headed girl, ambitious and I am sure she will reach the sky one day.
Simba - She will rule one day!

I still remember the first time I saw her... (Nobody would believe that I still remember, since I am too old now) she was the cutest baby with curls. Some one told me that I can’t take her home since she has some wounds on her legs pointing to a red mark on her little chubby thighs. From then she is my sole companion till my 27th year of age.

Remember those nights when she won’t let me sleep and the morning when she is too lazy to wake up …. Her bubbly mouth: P

Shhh… she is one who can keep my wildest secrets as SECRETS. I am the blessed to have a sister like her, who stands by me during my toughest times and loves me whole heartedly.

I cherish each and every moment spent with her… She is my childhood, she is my friend, she is my constant encouragement, she is my unconditional support, she is my unni…Wish you the best Simba!

Love
Chechi

A moment in my tummy… a lifetime in my heart!

Yesterday was the most beautiful day ever… ever in my life…. And am sure the beauty will increase every moment.

I had been for my first ultrasound. Though the image wasn’t that clear.. I could see some flicker. It was the heart beat. It’s so amazing. I am so excited. Really God is so creative… and human being the most wonderful creations.

I am touched. Today I feel I am a mother… To be a mom is the greatest gift from God. I am so proud.

O' my sweet heart… I wish to see your heart beat again and hear it through out my life.
You know... I can’t wait to see you.
I love you

Mumma